We often think of grooming as something predators do directly to children. But before they ever get that close, they groom the adults first. Predator
We often think of grooming as something predators do directly to children. But before they ever get that close, they groom the adults first.
Predators don’t just target vulnerable kids—they condition parents, caregivers, and authority figures to let their guard down.
By the time they move in on a child, they’ve already created an environment where people trust them, excuse them, or fail to recognize the danger.
🚨 How Predators Groom Parents & Caregivers
🔹 They make themselves ‘indispensable.’
- They offer free babysitting, mentorship, coaching, or special opportunities for kids.
- They go out of their way to be “helpful” so that no one questions their presence.
🔹 They build trust with flattery & charm.
- “You’re such a great parent. I wish more people raised their kids like you.”
- “I love spending time with kids—they just get me.”
Reality: Charm is a tool. Safe people earn trust over time; predators manipulate it quickly.
🔹 They push small boundaries with adults first.
- “Oh, I give all my friends’ kids hugs—it’s no big deal.”
- “Kids should be free to express themselves however they want.”
Reality: Groomers normalize boundary violations in minor ways so that when bigger red flags appear, people hesitate to react.
🔹 They create a ‘special bond’ with your child.
- “She tells me things she doesn’t even tell you.”
- “I just want to be a mentor. Every kid needs a trusted adult outside their parents.”
Reality: No safe adult undermines a child’s relationship with their parents or encourages secrecy.
🔹 They subtly challenge your authority.
- “You’re a little strict, aren’t you?”
- “Kids today need more freedom. You don’t want to hold them back.”
Reality: This is how predators begin separating children from their protectors.
🔹 They exploit progressive language.
- “It’s just education—they need to be exposed to different ideas.”
- “Times have changed. We need to be open-minded about how kids explore themselves.”
Reality: Anyone who rushes children into maturity, secrecy, or “liberation” outside of parental guidance is a walking red flag.
🚨 How to Stop a Predator Before They Gain Access
🚫 Do not let guilt override your instincts.
If something feels off, trust yourself. Predators count on adults being too polite to question their motives.
🚫 Set and enforce boundaries without apology.
If someone gets offended by clear boundaries, that’s a red flag—not your problem.
🚫 Do not let anyone position themselves between you and your child.
A truly safe adult will always reinforce a child’s trust in their parents or guardians—not weaken it.
🚫 Watch for patterns, not just single incidents.
Predators groom gradually. They build credibility, gain trust, and normalize access before they act.
🚫 Teach your child that secrets are never safe.
No adult should ever tell a child, “This stays between us.” Safe adults do not need secrecy.
🚨 Parents & Protectors—Stay 10 Steps Ahead
Predators do not want you to recognize their tactics. They rely on your trust, your kindness, and your hesitation.
Don’t give them that power. Trust your instincts. Ask questions. Enforce boundaries.
Your child doesn’t need more “trusted adults” in their life.
Your child needs safe adults. There is a difference.
📢 Protect. Educate. Speak up.
Protecting Our Daughters: Recognizing the New Age of Grooming
How Society Continues to Enable Abuse and Violation of Women and Girls in Sports
Bullies Side with Other Bullies—Don’t Let It Stun You, Take Action
Why the Crime of Sextortion is On the Rise and How You Can Protect Children
Familiar Faces, Hidden Dangers: Teaching Kids to Trust Wisely (audio/podcast)
COMMENTS