Too many girls are taught—directly or subtly—that being kind means keeping quiet when someone crosses the line. They’re told: “Don’t make
Too many girls are taught—directly or subtly—that being kind means keeping quiet when someone crosses the line.
They’re told:
“Don’t make a scene.”
“Just ignore it.”
“Be the bigger person.”
“He probably didn’t mean it like that.”
And so, from an early age, kindness becomes confusion:
Is it kind to let someone talk down to you?
Is it kind to stay friends with someone who keeps hurting you?
Is it kind to absorb disrespect just to keep the peace?
What we’re really teaching girls is self-abandonment in the name of social approval.
We’re training them to swallow their boundaries to make other people comfortable.
But kindness without boundaries is not kindness.
It’s submission.
⚠️ Why It’s Dangerous
It makes girls easier targets for manipulators and abusers.
It teaches them to doubt their instincts—even when something feels deeply wrong.
It sets the stage for triangulation, gaslighting, and coercive control.
It grooms them to apologize for speaking up, rather than see it as strength.
đź§ What to Teach Instead
Kindness does not mean silence.
It’s possible to be kind and assertive. Soft and strong.Your voice is sacred.
You don’t owe anyone your silence—especially not when you’re being harmed.Real kindness includes you.
It includes your peace, your comfort, and your right to be treated well.
We don’t want to raise girls who are just “nice.”
We want to raise girls who are clear, powerful, discerning, and safe.
Because one day, when someone tries to use kindness as a cage,
we want her to know:
She is allowed to leave. She is allowed to speak. She is allowed to choose herself.