Here in the West we talk about "child marriage" as if it is something done in far off places. As if when we do it, it is somehow "better". What a myth
Here in the West we talk about “child marriage” as if it is something done in far off places. As if when we do it, it is somehow “better”. What a myth!
Courtney Stodden’s Lifetime movie is not just entertainment—it’s an urgent warning for parents, caregivers, and safe adults. Courtney was only 16 when she married a 51-year-old man. The world called her a “child bride,” yet too few people stopped to ask the most important question: How was a child allowed to be exploited this way in the first place?
Here are the lessons RosasChildren believes every safe adult needs to take from this story:
1. Grooming Families Are Part of the Problem
Many children are groomed not only by outsiders, but within their own homes. Parents or guardians who fail to protect their children—sometimes out of denial, financial gain, or misplaced trust—become silent partners in abuse. Courtney’s story shows how dangerous it is when adults in a child’s life normalize exploitation instead of protecting them.
2. Flattery Is a Grooming Tool
Groomers know how to flatter young girls—telling them they are “special,” “mature for their age,” or “ready for adult love.” These words feel exciting to a child but are traps that make them more vulnerable. Adults must teach children that genuine love never requires secrecy, imbalance, or harm.
3. A “Child Bride” Is Still a Child
The phrase child bride carries its own truth. A child is a child. No matter how mature they look or sound, no 16-year-old has the life experience to enter a relationship with a 51-year-old adult. We must stop romanticizing what is, in fact, abuse.
4. Power Imbalance Means Abuse
When one partner is a child and the other is decades older, there is no equality. The older partner holds all the power—financial, emotional, social, and physical. This imbalance is inherently abusive, no matter how it is disguised.
5. Children Cannot Consent
Consent requires full understanding, autonomy, and freedom to say no. A child does not have the developmental maturity to provide that. Courtney’s story reminds us that children in these relationships will likely outgrow them while the older partner continues aging into senior adulthood, trapping the younger partner in caretaking roles.
6. Child Brides Are Forced into Caretaking Too Soon
One of the most overlooked harms is that these girls often end up caring for much older partners before they’ve learned to care for themselves. Instead of pursuing education, dreams, and self-discovery, they are burdened with adult responsibilities far too early.
7. Public Grooming Is Still Grooming
Courtney was groomed in full view of the world. Tabloids mocked her, celebrities encouraged her to self-harm, and society laughed instead of intervening. When exploitation becomes entertainment, children suffer twice—once in private, and again in public.
8. Empathy for Children Is Still Too Rare
Perhaps the hardest lesson of all is that society still lacks the compassion and protective instinct required to keep children safe. Courtney’s film asks us: when will we stop blaming children and start holding adults accountable?
✨ Final Word for Safe Adults
Courtney Stodden’s Lifetime story is not just her story—it is a lesson book for us all. Children must never be used to fulfill the unmet needs, entertainment, or desires of adults. They need safe adults who recognize grooming tactics, speak up against power imbalances, and protect children before the harm becomes permanent.