Survivor Snippet:âWhen I was younger, no one stepped inânot because they didnât care, but because they didnât believe someone my age could be danger
Survivor Snippet:
âWhen I was younger, no one stepped inânot because they didnât care, but because they didnât believe someone my age could be dangerous. I needed someone to stop the harm, to say, âThis isnât normal, and youâre not alone. But no one did.”
-Anonymous Survivor
As an advocate, this is a commonly heard story. You hear this account from victims on hotlines, in domestic violence Survivor’s backgrounds, and in backgrounds of other people vulnerable to crime. How violation began among their peers.Â
We donât like to think about it, but itâs true:
Some adolescents do engage in sexually harmful, coercive, or abusive behavior toward younger children.
This doesnât mean theyâre âmonsters.â
But it does mean that someone needs to interveneâimmediately and appropriatelyâto stop harm, support the victim, and address the underlying behavior.
We must hold space for both truth and healing:
The safety of younger children always comes first.
The adolescent needs structure, guidance, and accountabilityânot silence or minimization.
đ Why Itâs Hard to Spot
Adults often miss or ignore red flags because:
The teen is âjust a kidâ too
The child being targeted âdidnât say anythingâ
The behavior is masked as curiosity, roughhousing, or play
Adults fear labeling the adolescent permanently
But ignoring harmful behavior doesnât help either child.
Early intervention can redirect a harmful path and protect others.
đ§ Common Behaviors to Watch For
Here are red flags that may indicate a young person (usually an adolescent) is displaying predatory or sexually harmful behavior toward a younger child:
đ© Secrecy
Constantly trying to be alone with younger children
Resisting adult supervision
Telling the younger child to keep secrets about their time together
đ© Sexual Knowledge Beyond Age Level
Using sexual language around or with younger children
Exposing younger kids to pornography or explicit material
Engaging in inappropriate âgamesâ (e.g., truth or dare with sexual tasks)
đ© Boundary Testing
Tickling, wrestling, or âplay fightingâ that crosses comfort lines
Watching or following younger kids into the bathroom
Touching or undressing games disguised as âaccidentsâ or âfunâ
đ© Targeting Vulnerability
Seeking out younger kids who are quiet, isolated, or looking for attention
Befriending younger siblings or neighbors who look up to them
Using status (âIâm olderâ) to manipulate trust or obedience
đ© Controlling or Coercive Behavior
Threatening younger children with consequences if they âtellâ
Bribing them with candy, screen time, or special attention
Grooming: building emotional dependency to enable abuse
đ Why It Matters
Many adult offenders report first harming others as adolescentsâand being ignored when they should have been stopped.
At the same time, early intervention can change behavior.
There is support available. But silence is not a strategy.
đĄïž What You Can Do
Supervise: Don’t assume all adolescents will “babysit well” without training or support.
Teach boundaries: Reinforce consent, personal space, and privacy.
Believe children: If a child reports discomfort or confusion, take it seriously.
Create safe disclosure zones: Let kids know they can always tell you anything without punishment.
Seek professional help: Therapists trained in child sexual behavior can guide both protection and rehabilitation.
đŹ One Last Thing
Itâs hard. Itâs heartbreaking.
But naming these red flags helps break the cycleâfor both the potential victim and the adolescent showing signs of harm.
As protectors, our job isnât to panic.
Itâs to intervene with love, with firmness, and with wisdom.
[rosaschildren.com] | [wesurviveabuse.com] | [survivoraffirmations.com]
Share if you feel safe and readyâyour voice might be the lifeline someone else needs. And if you do share, remember to cite the messenger. Words carry legacy.